EFFORTLESS: HOW TO WEAR A KIMONO

Ugh, you guys, life is SO BUSY. It’s hard enough finding the time to slice an avocado, toast bread, assemble the two together, make your bed, climb into bed without spilling it or your foamy cappuccino, style your legs with the toast and coffee and your NY Times prop, take fifty pictures of the complicated setup, filter your top five pics, crop and then post to all ten of your social media channels, let alone EAT IT.

Because of all of this super important life stress, I find it’s best if you can combine as many tasks as possible into one – like sleeping in a kimono and then wearing it the next day to run errands and look busy and important. Kimonos are great because they’re so silky and comfy and also SO VALUABLE on the festival circuit [this is where young people go to dress exactly like their grandmas in the 70s, but without clothes], making you look younger, and thus, SO RELEVANT. Typically worn open over a denim waistband and see-through bikini top, we ladies of a certain age may make everyone else feel a little more comfortable by opting for a slightly more sophisticated styling. I like to wear mine wrapped and pinned a million times over another complete outfit. The look is TOTALLY EFFORTLESS.

Images by Shelby Allison
Images by Shelby Allison

Here’s a simple diagram, so you can create your own carefree middle-aged kimono festival look at home:

Like I said, the whole thing just screams EFFORTLESS, and you’ll probably only have to readjust the pins once every twenty minutes. Ohmigod, you’re so interesting and V COOKY BLOGGER FASHION GIRL.

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